Current thoughts
I've been finding it difficult this year to generate any meaningful momentum. Our weapon's beta form is due in just over a week, and I feel like I'm still trying to find my groove with this. Funny enough, I'm still getting most of my reps in, I just don't feel like I'm doing it in a mindful way lately. It's more, I'm getting the reps in, for the sake of getting the reps in. I'm feeling stunted creatively, the art part of my martial art is missing from my training. Still feel like I'm being pulled in a lot of directions. Vacation was good, but didn't manage to do a whole lot of training when I was away, and I feel like my edge has dulled because of it.
Now that I've gotten that out of the way, what has been going well is this: gratitude, meditation, mental/emotional work, relationships, creative writing. Basically the non-physical aspects of my training. Do I feel a bit discouraged about my physical training at the moment? Yes, but at the same time I know this isn't anything new, and that it will pass. If last year was a year of pushing my physical body, this year I'm pushing my mental-emotional body. Clearing some old patterns, and working through some old wounds. Although a lot of this stuff I am doing on my own, it is important for me to keep engaged with my team, and my training.
Not a lot of great insights here, more just framing my mindset right now, and letting my instructors and teammates know where I'm at. Looking forward to stepping back on those mats tonight.
Personally I think the mental/internal aspect of our training is the most important and the harder part to maintain. So it sounds like you're doing great. Although I do understand that you might feel like you're lacking physically....because ideally we want to be firing on all cylinders. But it also sounds like you're still physically training even if you don't feel super into it. And that's exactly what you're supposed to do so you should feel good about that rather than bad. I often go through phases where I'm just hammering out reps. I don't let it get to me that they aren't incredibly mindful. Sometimes you just have to maintain until something ignites once again. And it will if you just keep going. Everything you're doing is meaningful.
ReplyDeleteThere is no such thing as being 100% in the game 100% of the time. Bad stints will exist, and they happen to the best of us. As long as you do not accept the "bad stint" as the new norm, I think that is a key part of being both a martial artist and a human and it seems you understand this as well. It may also help to look at your definition of "meaningful momentum". The momentum you do have may be a lot more meaningful than you might think. After all, slow progress still happens to be progress.
ReplyDeleteArt and Science. Internal and External. Physical and Mental. They are all sides of the same dice. Mastery of Kung Fu requires us to feed all sides. Right now you find yourself focusing on the mental side of things. There is nothing wrong with that, especially when you seem to know exactly where you are at. Ride this wave and take solace that while your physical engagement is not where you want it to be, you are engaged nevertheless.
ReplyDeleteMy training is relentless. However it is not always focused where I want it to be and, in the case of a looming form beta version deadline, where I need it to be. Se la vie.
I feel that your mental training influences your physical training way more than most people realize or give it credit. Not just “I feel motivated, let’s train” influence, more like “I’m at peace therefore my physical body can let down its guard and relax, allowing more natural motion and flow to enter the equation “. You’re making progress in both areas by progressing in one.
ReplyDeleteI also feel the mental training is more important than the physical training.
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