Relationship mended

        I find this to be an interesting requirement because relationships are ongoing work. Even once one is mended it still takes continuous effort to maintain.  Honestly, the last 2 years of this requirement, the relationship that needed mending most was my relationship with myself.

         Now, I have since mended another relationship, an external one after coming home to myself after 2 years of personal work.  I think I needed the space and time to do some personal exploring and healing before I could mend this relationship with a friend.  A lot of the mending was just done with time and small acts to help rebuild trust and a sense of safety.  From the conversation we had today, the same was true for them.  They had a lot of personal work to do, so they too needed time and space.  

         A relationship is a lot like mastery.  It requires consistent effort or action to build and maintain.  It requires mindfulness and self awareness.  They too are vulnerable to mediocrity in a sense that we can become complacent in our role in them.  We’ll make mistakes that will require correction.  They are a journey and not a destination.  Interesting then that we assign it an arbitrary timeline.  On the other hand, these deadlines require us to take some form of action.  In the case of mending a relationship, we can commit to it for a year and it may not yet be mended; however you can keep true to the requirement by continually making effort to heal it.

         An important note on relationships is that not all relationships are equal.  Some are not worth the effort you are putting in. Some are a one way street that can become draining.  Some just run their course as you outgrow each other, have different goals, or are in just different phases of life. They can be very fluid and interchanging- could part ways for a period of time only to find your way back.  One should look at the relationship one holds with themselves, for unhealed parts can lead us astray and having you seek superficial relationships.  Relationships should be built on mutual respect and not transactional. Relationships, a sense of belonging, and community are linked with longer lifespans.