Goals

         Last night Master Brinker asked us all if we plan on getting our black belt, and of course everyone raised their hand.  He talked about looking at how we trained and setting a realistic timeline to achieve that goal; he also talked about having someone in mind that you aspire to be to help keep the goal in sight and have a target to achieve.  If I had to set a timeline based on my training now, I'd have to say 5-6 years before I would get my black belt.  As to having someone I aspire to be like, that part is difficult for me.  I'm not really one to have idols, to me they're all just people living their lives like me.  Maybe this sounds egotistical, but I put faith in myself, because at the end of the day that is who I'm most accountable too, and ultimately I am the one I need to rely on.  That's not to say that there aren't traits that I admire in others.  I can look around the space of the Kwoon and pick out traits of people around me that inspire me, and that I admire.  

        My reasoning for wanting to achieve that black belt is like everything else I aspire to do, to better myself.  It is to become a better version of the me from a day, week, month, year ago.  I recognize that there will be times that this growth will be small, and plateau even, and times that it will be exponential. Sometimes I may take some steps back, hit a slump and just plain feel stuck.  All of these experiences help me.  As I write this, I realize that the black belt is really just a symbol, or even a giant metaphor for what I try to achieve out of my everyday, and that's personal growth.  I'll never be perfect, even though it is perfection that I reach for.  Throughout this, I set different goals that all pertain to my overarching goal of self improvement.  I also need to reflect on my intent, because success sometimes looks a little different than what we envisioned.  Case in point, my business; when I set out to make Risen, my goal was to create a space where my staff was happy, that clients loved, and that a sense of community could be created.  I've hit that goal, but on the other side of that same coin is financial hardship.  My business is not successful in that aspect, I am still very much struggling financially.  Again, my original goal was achieved, money is secondary.  I didn't create Risen to make a lot of money, I made it for other reasons, I just hope to still make enough to provide for me and my family as well.  On that note, I'm going to stop there before I ramble on more.