Gratitude, Priorities, and Time

         When we found out we were expecting and then told people, many offered help to us when baby arrived.  Living in a world where most offer kind words or help with no intention of follow through, just to be “nice”, it is relieving when so many people actually showed up to help.  I feel such gratitude to the people in our lives.  My partner and I have both spent a lot of time building the kind of life we want to live, and a big part of that is surrounding ourselves with the kind of people we want in that life.  Sometimes that means saying goodbye to old friends, old jobs, old places.  I for sure don’t take for granted the friends and family who have shown up to help us raise Cillian.  As they say “It takes a village”, and I truly believe that’s true.  Not just to support the parents, but to help shape the tiny human by positive influences.

        Obviously my priorities have shifted with this new addition.  My partner and Cillian are my top priorities, along with my own mental health.  I go back to work next week and have some worry how they will be when I’m away for chunks of time.  We have reached out to friends and family to support Sara while I’m away.  I also very, badly want to get back to the Kwoon, but that may look a bit sporadic at the moment.  My physical training has slowed some, but I am managing to get some form reps in here and there, as well as keep up with my push-ups and sit-ups.  I do fear that I’m falling a bit behind as I adjust to the new norm.  I am focusing on quality of what I’m doing versus quantity.  Really focusing and being mindful of what I am doing, what my intentions are, and what I’m actually feeling/presenting.  I’ve garnered a few insights and a lot more questions.

         Crazy that it’s almost already been two weeks since Cillian came into our world.  That’s two weeks away from being active at the Kwoon, two weeks of interrupted sleep, three weeks since I’ve worked, and a lifetime ahead of me of building a relationship and shaping a mind.  Time is a funny thing. Seemed to be so much of it that went so slow when I was younger, to knowing I have less of it now and it just seems to go faster.  My hope is to stay as mindful as I can and to try and enjoy the ride.  My time is now tied to another precious life; and that is time shared.