Who am I?

         I’ve been thinking about all the things I have gone through the last couple of years.  The hardships faced.  The victories.  The memories, good and bad.  If I had to put an overarching theme to this, it would be that of resilience.

         This latest turn of events, my knee injury, is just another blip on my journey.  I’m not mad about it though.  I’m sure I will have some frustrating days to come, but for now it is what it is.  It happened and all I can do is try to stay positive about it and move on.  Perhaps it is because I have experienced so much hardship the last couple of years that this just feels like another thing to add to the pile.  I’ve been through worse and I have come out the other side better for it.  I know it never felt that way in the moment, but when I look back I know all those events took place because they needed to for me to get to where I am.

        Things happen.  Things will happen to you.  Those things DON’T DEFINE you though.  They may be important to the journey, but they don’t define it. Others may look at what’s happened and make judgements.  They may have a “definition” of who you are; but people always will.  Some people, based off their own limited, and biased experiences, will have a representation of you already in their mind.  That’s not the real you though.  I am my own thoughts and actions, not the thoughts and actions of others.  I know who I am at my core.  Injuries and setbacks aren’t who I am, just things that have happened.  It’s more how I respond and the actions I take.  Even then, sometimes our actions or reactions, aren’t a great representation of who we are.  It’s a snapshot in a vast tapestry of our lives.  It lacks context.  How can you sum up an entire life in single moment?  It is in the little moments day-in and day-out.  It is when no one is around to witness.  It is in a smile or nod. It’s millions of tiny moments woven together that create who you are.  The big stuff?  The big stuff is just what shifts directions.  Forces you back, or around, or over.

         What I’ve learned over the years is that I am RESILIENT.  I can do and overcome hard things.  Simplest way I can sum it up is just to keep putting one foot in front of the other.  Doesn’t matter what the challenge is, you just keep moving forwards.  Sure it’s important to look back, but understand that you can’t go back.  You can look at what’s past and hopefully learn some lessons, but maybe not.  So, you move boldly forward and hopefully you do things a little differently.

         Moments don’t define me, though I can have defining moments.  This is one of them.  I choose to proceed boldly and know that there is a lot of value to be had in the turmoil.  I will come out the other side changed.  Hopefully for the better, but also different; and that’s okay.